


From What Is Pure, Is Tainted

by KillerAkuma



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-14 01:27:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11197590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillerAkuma/pseuds/KillerAkuma
Summary: What if everything that you lived – existed – for just disappeared in one fateful storm. Everything that you wanted to be was taken and you had to find a new purpose or fight to regain the one you lost. Would you fight or would you choose another fate?





	1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

* * *

_White snow that contrasts upon thee_

_Can you please hear my final plea?_

_The path I sought was not mine to take_

_So does this mean that all of this was a mistake?_

_Oh God who watches over me can you here my final plea?_

_Will you help me choose a path, where I’ll be safe and free?_

_Mighty warrior who injured me, hear my final breath_

_Thank you for helping me and allowing me to have a peaceful death._

* * *

 

White.

Everything was covered in this colour, the trees, the land and even the small figure that was curled up and struggling to stay warm from the bitter wind. The figure’s hair was almost the same as the blinding white that laid beneath it. Pale skin that lost all colour and pale blue lips that were struggling to stay from quivering and chattering teeth seeming to barely audible and visible gasps of air that barely fogged in the darkening sky. Eyes shut tightly, hiding glossy mercury pools that you could almost drown in when they shone with warmth and compassion.

The figure wore a coat – a navy blue and white one – that had silver buttons running down the front; if you were to turn over the buttons you would clearly see the engraving of the name ‘ _Allen Walker’_ , who is the lovely gentlemen who is now freezing to death in this snow. Mercury eyes cracked open to see his trusty companion nuzzling his cheek and rubbing his tail against his chest trying to keep him warm, a faint and quivering smile grace Allen’s lips as he slowly raised his left hand and pat Tim – the golden sphere – Allen’s voice was soft and shaky as he spoke. “T-tim… Take th-the… Innocence I-I have an-nd bring i-it ba-ck to the Or-der… Th-then fi-nd Ma-aster… G-go Tim… And… Te-ll the o-others I’m sorry I f-f-failed…”

Tim had tears flooding down his face as he looked at Allen, who gently pushed him away. Tim fluttered there for another second before flying off into the oncoming storm. Allen’s smile dropped as darkness seemed to appear in the corner of his eyes, closing them and letting out a sigh as he curled into himself a little more before falling into unconsciousness.

……

_“Where am I?”_

_“Am I dead?”_

_“No, I can’t be, can I?”_

**_“…..”_ **

_“What? What did you say?”_

**_“…..?”_ **

_“I-I don’t understand. What are you saying?”_

**_“…..?!”_ **

_The voice that seemed to be made of static got louder as something warm, no hot seemed to be placed on him, the very heat coming from it made his skin burn as if someone were dipping his body in wax or putting him into a boiling pit of tar. It was pure agony but for some reason he didn’t bother to try to remove the warmth._

_It felt good but then again it didn’t._

_The pain it sent him was plain agony but for some reason in his mind was telling him it was trying to help him._

_It confused him greatly._

_He wasn’t sure if he should move away from it or stay close._

_The pain it was sending him wanted to make him run from it and never look back but the darkness and cold that were away from the warmth didn’t seem any better._

_He could either freeze or boil._

_Freezing meant that his body would eventually feel so cold that you would feel warm and happy just before you die. Just like falling to sleep._

_Or boil to death until you have nothing left in your body to keep you hydrated until you pass out and fall into an endless black._

_Neither sounded great but did he have to choose one or the other?_

_Did he want to freeze or boil?_

_Did he want it to end or continue?_

_He grabbed his head as the voice that had gone silent returned with a vengeance. Its static high but low voice grated against his ears as he tried to block out the sound but it was futile for the voice was simply echoing in his head._

_He felt like his ears were about to burst or bleed, until it all just fell silent._

_Nothing._

_No static voice._

_Just nothing._

_A bright light lip up the darkness and blinded him, the warmth from the light wrapped around his being and pulled him towards it. He shut his eyes tightly as the light somehow seemed to get brighter._

_The light was so bright that it seemed to seep through his eyelids and it still hit his eyes, he tried to turn his gaze from the light but it seemed like a futile task for the light seemed to follow. The bright light after what felt like hours disappeared and was replaced with a dull glow, Allen cracked open his eyes, blinking a couple times to get rid of the spots in his vision, once he could see correctly again he saw a figure bathed in light._

_There features were not seen for the light glowed around them and cast a shadow over their face. Their voice was deep but had the slightest bit of static and melody undertone that it almost seemed beautiful._

**_“Blink your eyes, wake from this dream. For what’s in here is never as seems.”_ **

…..

Mercury eyes stayed firmly close as the rustling of fabric and quiet footsteps were heard near him. His eyelids twitched as he tried to open them but they felt so heavy as if something was keeping them closed or they were glued that way. Frowning slightly, he attempted to move his limbs; he first tried his left hand. It felt like lead but it moves none the less, other than just feeling like dead weight.

He gently rolled his wrist then lifted his right hand slightly and heard a slight popping sound as it cracked. He placed his hands either side of him as he gently propped himself up and against the headboard and pillows. Pain struck his nerves as he attempted to move his stiff and sore legs.

But something didn’t seem right.

He curled his toes or at least tried to but something was extremely odd.

He couldn’t curl the toes on his right foot.


	2. Chapter 2

_White snow that contrasts upon thee_

_Can you please hear my final plea?_

_The path I sought was not mine to take_

_So does this mean that all of this was a mistake?_

_Oh God who watches over me can you here my final plea?_

_Will you help me choose a path, where I’ll be safe and free?_

_Mighty warrior who injured me, hear my final breath_

_Thank you for helping me and allowing me to have a peaceful death._

* * *

 Allen’s heart rate seemed to increase as he fought to open his eyes and see why he couldn’t move the bottom half of his leg. Worry and fear began to creep into his chest causing his breath to come out in an uneven burst. The other being in the room moved towards Allen as they place firm hands on his shoulders, keeping him down and on the bed. Their voice was calm and deep and spoke if they were talking to a panicked animal. “Hey, calm down, there’s no need to panic. Sssh, everything’s alright… ssh, you’re fine…”

Allen tried his best to even out his breathing as he slowly, ever so slowly cracked open his eyes to a dim lit room, the figure still lurking above him smiled slightly as he moved away and his brain finally could match a face and name together. “Tyki? W-what am I doing here? What’s wrong with my leg?!”

Tyki moved to the other end of the bed as he leaned against the bedpost, “I found your unconscious form in the middle of a snowstorm, I was in the area looking for innocence and I could sense yours. I brought you to the small manor I owned and helped you…”

Allen narrowed his eyes at Tyki as his voice changed as he spoke the last couple of words. He looked down at his leg, his breath caught in his throat as his eyes widened as he slowly leaned forward to touch the stump below his knee. Gasping when his leg wasn’t really there, hands shaking as he fought back tears. 

‘ _What? Why is my_ -’

“W-what happened?” He nearly choked on his words as he let his head droop, his mind racing with so many thoughts and emotions.

“I brought a doctor here and he said that your leg had serve frostbite and that getting rid of it was the best thing to do,” Tyki frowned slightly as he continued to speak evenly, “You can stay here till your able to handle moving around, again.”

Allen’s gaze was locked on the stump at the end of his leg, thick bandaging wrapped around it as he couldn’t quite believe that his leg was gone, it didn’t seem real. It felt like a bad dream that he couldn’t wake up from and all Allen wanted to do was wake up. He slowly reached up to run his fingers through his knotted white hair, releasing a shaky breath as he slowly looked up towards Tyki, “How long…. How long have I been out?”

“Uh, couple days. Three at most.” Tyki pushed himself from the bedpost as he moved to a chair that was situated near the corner of the room. His golden eyes gazing at him with concern and a faint amount of worry as he fumbled with his pockets to find something that would relieve some of the stress from his muscles. Finding what he was looking for he placed it between his teeth as he found a box of matches, striking a match as he gently let the flame caress the end of the cigarette.

Allen tried to swallow the lump in his throat as he slowly lifted his left leg over the edge of the bed and then looking to his right as he did the same. He bit into his thin lips as he felt the soft carpet between his toes on one foot and then simply imagined the other. Imagined.

‘ ** _Adapt and overcome. You must_**.’   

He shakily rested his hand on either side of himself as he slowly pushed himself onto his foot, licking his chapped lips as his brows scrunched together in concentration. His leg wobbled a little as he used the bed as support, swaying slightly as he breathed in and out slowly. His chest heavy as if he were still out in the cold, the frozen winds freezing his lungs as he tried to control his uneven breathing.

He attempted to hop forward a little only for his knee to give way and him to clasps against the side of the bed. His knuckles turned white as the bed sheets bunched in his hands, his head resting on his arms as he tried to prevent the tears that burned his eyes like acid. ‘ _Mana, I can’t do this. I can’t move forward. I can’t even walk. Mana what do I do?_ ’

His bottom lip trembled as his shoulder shook like leaves in the wind, sniffling and trying to choke back sobs. The tears rolled down his cheeks like a steady river as he hid his face in his arms, arms quivering as his grip only tighten on the sheets. He felt like a child, he felt weak and vulnerable. He felt like the scared child when Cross had found him injured and bleeding. He felt like the world around him was crumbling, that what he wanted to do and become had been shattered like someone breaking glass.

He was lost.

He was alone.

He was cold.

He couldn’t breathe.

The heavy scent of smoke surrounded him as a pair of arms were snaked around his waist, slowly lifting him as the owner of the arms placed Allen on his lap. Teary mercury eyes gazed up to look into molten gold, hiccupping on sobs like a child as the man just kept his comforting grip on him. His slender shoulder slowly stopped shaking as the cold faded, the warmth radiating from the man warming him and letting his body be flooded with warmth. Allen felt his eyes droop, his hiccups steadily stopping as he lifted a hand to rest on the man’s chest, feeling a faint thud beneath his hand.

He shouldn’t allow this, he shouldn’t let the enemy comfort him. But at this moment, he didn’t care. He couldn’t care. How could the man be his enemy if he was unable to fight anymore? Unable to fight alongside the people he considered friends and family.

Timcampy.

Timcampy had gone back to the Order.

The Order would think him dead, not among the living after Tim shows them the video of his last words.

His hand clutched into Tyki’s shirt tighten before relaxing, his eyes slowly falling close as he released a sigh. Let them think him dead.

The exorcist Allen Walker they knew died in the snowstorm.

And that’s what they needed to think and believe.


End file.
